Bringing one baby into the world is life-changing—bringing two at once? A whole other level.
I wouldn’t be honest if I didn’t start this out by saying that I STRUGGLED the first year of my twins life. Postpartum hit me harder than expected. My partner travels for work so I was home by myself with 2 newborns 80% of the time. I just didn’t feel like myself at all.
The first year with twins is an incredible self-learning journey filled with double the diapers, double the feedings, and of course, double the love. But—it’s also exhausting, overwhelming, and sometimes downright chaotic.
As a twin mom, I’ve been there—sleepless nights, never-ending laundry, and feeling like I’m constantly running on fumes and energy drinks. But with time, support, and a few survival strategies, I made it through that first intense year—and I know you will too.
Here’s my personal survival guide for getting through the first 12 months with twins, one breath, one day, one diaper at a time.
1. Take It Day by Day (Sometimes Hour by Hour)
When you’re knee-deep in bottles, burp cloths, and blowouts, even imagining the light at the end of the tunnel can be difficult. Instead of stressing about what next week or next month looks like- focus on the ‘now’.
Know that you’re not alone. Know that another mother is going through the same thing. Whether across the street or across the world, there is another mom feeling the same way.
Set small, manageable goals. Maybe it’s getting both babies down for a nap at the same time, or taking a shower before noon, or just washing the dishes once during the day. Celebrate those wins—because in twin life, they’re big victories. This phase won’t last forever, even though it might feel like it in the moment.
Pro Tip: Keep a whiteboard or simple checklist where you can mark off small daily tasks. It helps track feedings, naps, and gives a little dopamine boost every time you check something off. We had a whiteboard where I wrote down every feed and bowel movement. It helped me remember which baby did what and when.
2. Get Outside for Fresh Air and Sunlight
Even a 15-minute walk can be a total game-changer for your mood and energy. Fresh air and sunlight can help regulate your circadian rhythms, improve sleep (for both you and the babies), and boost your mental health.
If getting out solo with two babies feels super hard, start small—sit on the porch, open a window, or wear one baby and push the other in a stroller. Over time, short walks can become your daily reset.
There were times when both babies were screaming the whole entire walk. I tried to have the mindset of “they’re going to scream- might as well be outside”. The crying feels less intense when outside.
Bonus: Sunlight helps babies develop a healthy sleep-wake cycle too. Double win!
3. Lean on Friends and Family—Seriously, Don’t Be a Hero
You might feel like you need to prove that you can do it all on your own (even if you have a helpful partner), but you don’t HAVE to. Whether it’s a friend offering to drop off dinner or a family member willing to hold a baby while you nap—just say yes.
I don’t live near any of my friends of family, so I had to rely on a more virtual support system. Even a FaceTime or SnapChat made me feel so much better and so much more seen.
Not comfortable asking for help? Frame it like this: “Would you mind coming over just to hold one baby so I can deal with the other?” Most people really do want to help out- they just don’t want to feel like they’re overstepping boundaries.
4. There Is Light at the End of the Tunnel
The newborn phase is insane, and I’ve heard that twin parents feel like they’re stuck in survival mode for much longer than singleton parents. But I PROMISE—it gets better. Around 3 to 4 months, you may notice longer stretches of sleep. Around 6 months, you’ll see more personality and giggles. And by 12 months? You’ll look back and think, “Wow. I really did that.” Once the twins were off of bottles at 12 months I started to see a dim light.
It took me a good 18 months to FULLY feel like I got out of the newborn fog that I was in. There’s no specific time frame- every mom is on her own journey.
Keep reminders around that this is a season, not a life sentence. A note on the fridge, a favorite quote on your phone, or a message from another twin mom can help you stay grounded on tough days.
Real Talk: You will get sleep again. You will have time to eat a meal sitting down. You’ll laugh again—and not just the “I’m so tired I’m crying” kind of laugh.
5. Set Realistic Expectations (and Throw Perfection Out the Window)
Your house will most likely not be spotless, and that’s okay. Dinner might be almost non existent some nights, and that’s okay too. Focus on keeping your twins fed, safe, and loved—and yourself as mentally sane and as healthy as possible.
Social media can definitely skew how motherhood looks on the outside. If you find yourself going down the rabbit hole of “perfect moms” on social media- get off. Immediately.
6. Find Your Twin Mom Tribe
It could be a Facebook group, a local mom meet-up group, or just an Instagram account that makes you feel seen—connect with other twin moms. No one truly gets it like another twin parent. Hearing “OMG me too” from someone who’s walked the same path can be the lifeline you need.
They say there’s power in solidarity. Let me say this again- you are not alone. Even when you feel like the only one awake at 3 a.m.
Final Thoughts: You’re Doing Better Than You Think
Twin parenting is hard—there’s no sugarcoating it. But the love? The bond? The resilience you build? It’s unmatched.
The first year will test you in ways you never even imagined, but it will also mold you into the strongest version of yourself.
So breathe. Step outside. Ask for help. Take it one day at a time. And always remember: you’re braver than you believe, stronger than you seem, and smarter than you think. (Yes, I just quoted Winnie the Pooh)
